The Secret

I should be studying, I know. But since this literally smacked me, I’m compelled to put aside my books and write type this down.

I was, actually, just wondering, whether I should or should I not reveal this tiny secret that often comes about pricking my self-esteem. But this is, anyway, rather funny. Beginning with some depth in it, it’ll gradually stir into embarrassment and ultimately cool off in good humor.

It was a long time ago though, but my luck has always been pretty good when it comes to being acquainted with the ‘wrong’ people. With previous matters still running in the background, this time, once again, a new (though short) chapter was introduced; and I almost, “virtually” became acquainted with yet another wrong person.

Skipping the long epilogue, the secret could be revealed as simple.

Having a friend of a friend’s friend, the ‘good-looking’ guy interested in me created the air of self-admiration (get the hint that I’m not exaggerating). Because yeah, well, one of the sad parts about my life is, I had always received messages (on facebook) from the rookies and untidy, funkie “kool” guys (not that if they were the ‘good’ kind, I had considered them even then).

So anyway, yes, I wasn’t even spoken to (sigh) neither any practical approach was made; for which I was very much thankful since that was something I really didn’t want. It was all fun and game, all in the head and just among us friends. A couple of months passed and the ‘sizzling’ issue cooled off like anything else.

One day, very randomly, I logged into my facebook when to my immense surprise I was notified that ‘THIS PERSON has POKED you.’ I jumped in amazement, exclaimed with joy and (almost) danced with excitement! Though personally I was moved by his laziness, for seriously, it took him three months to poke? But never mind that.

I was poked two days ago from the day I logged in. Two days. The question that occupied me was whether to poke back or to show indifference (which was honestly, very difficult). I also pondered over the various possibilities, one of which was what on earth would I do if in response to my returning poke he messaged me? I didn’t want that, definitely. Now, the sort of over-thinker I am, who happen to regard a disgusting timid lizard equal to a reptile invasion, it wouldn’t be that difficult to imagine how I must’ve treated THIS which comparatively WAS something big enough.

I (still breathing the air of self-admiration) assumed that he must be dying, waiting for my response, eeeeh.

After further two days, having received multiple advices and working out against majority, I poked back. Now if you honestly ask me, the moment I did (this was the second time when I got this gut feeling), I knew I shouldn’t have.

1/3 This was the picture (out of an entire album) my friend uploaded later to add to my embarrassment

My estimate was of three days, maximum; in three days, I’d receive the response, or even early. Those three days passed like three centuries. With every day, with every passing century, my anxiety grew –the poke never came.
A week passed and the fog of embarrassment slowly descended down, encircling me. To console my declining spirit, my friends tried justifying, “he probably hadn’t logged in ever since. And also, they’re having exams, ya’know.” But immediately, in a playful mocking tone, they’d add, “don’t lose hope…”
I on the other hand had lost all of it. Two weeks were gone and the poke was still missing. My dreams had shattered and the ‘air’ of self-admiration vented out completely, leaving me suffocating in the atmosphere of ‘betrayal’. OK, exaggerations apart, I was disappointed. The faint feeling of embarrassment had by now (you can obviously imagine) turned into an aching insult. I went back to regretting the moment when I had poked him back.
So one day, just to be sure, I opened his facebook profile and decided to take some risk. I thought since my ego has been destroyed, might as well bury it now. The settings suggest you cannot poke the same person again unless he had either removed your poke or responded back.
Just to check, I clicked at his ‘poke’ tab, and to my devastating surprise I was notified:

Your Poke Has Been Removed.

Has Been Removed.

Been Removed.

Removed.

SERIOUSLY!? REMOVED?! What did I even do?! My bubble was busted. I wanted to drown myself. It felt like I’ve been stabbed by a rusty dagger! He removed my poke? Come on! Why did he even poke me then? Was this some kind of nasty joke? I was fuming in rage. I angrily left his page and immediately (like always) informed my friends about the intense, epic moment of discovery that I’ve been “virtually” dumped.

My friends, the ultimate Gurus suggested me to block him. Seriously? If I’d have blocked him, how was I supposed to get my poke back, ever? I didn’t listen, of course, like always.With the hilarious jokes (I never wanted to laugh at those jokes, but shucks, I did), mocking yet humorous comments, fake assumed stories of ‘what might’ve prevented him from poking back’ and consoling remarks, my “wound” healed faster and the fog of embarrassment gradually lifted.

Now, when quite a long time has passed, it seems extremely silly. Who was he anyway? An average looking, mean guy? Might I add, a confirmed psycho? Feels funny. Though still, somewhere deep down, I’m still hoping for a poke back, but this time, I would be the ditcher. I’ve got a good plan to avenge myself.

2/3

(I seriously, earnestly, with all my heart, hope that he may NEVER come across this post).

3/3

So much for a poke. They should bloody remove this poke option altogether. No, wait... Nah, they shouldn't (if you know why). *winks*